I have continued to forge ahead on my MMJ Adventure (the struggle is real:) – seeking relief from the chronic pain that had taken over and threatened my quality of life. As I have shared, I am most definitely experiencing relief using cannabis. The pain hasn’t gone away, but it is now regularly showing up at a lower level than existed in my “pre-pot” days. I am still primarily using Super Skunk – and it is still proving to be a great fit for me – lowers the pain but really does not mess with my mind. It allows me to see beyond the pain, to participate and focus on other things – which is certainly a pleasant change.
With the pain levels dropping, and being able to notice other things, I have rediscovered the heavy dead feeling in my feet and legs I had in my early years of this disease. As I describe it – it’s that feeling that you get in your foot – when it has gone to sleep. It feels heavy, dead, numb….WEIRD. It’s the feeling that you have just BEFORE you stomp your foot and the pins and needles commence. But there are never pins and needles, no matter how much stomping I do, just the heavy and weird feeling.
I haven’t noticed this sensation in a very long time although I am pretty sure it has been there all along; it just couldn’t be separated out from the pain. The pain was louder and muted everything else. Now that the pain has quieted down a bit, I am able to feel other things. I realize that for some, hearing that I am excited about being able to feel this MS symptom (the “Dead Feet Syndrome- DFS” as I lovingly refer to it) might seem absurd but it is a return to something in the past – something that is familiar, something that existed before the pain put the blinders on and took over.
I’ve also noticed that the fatigue that I remember from my “pre-pain” days has returned. Another “perk” that might not sound as if it is desirable. But I am good with it because it is something that I can once again notice; that I experience as something that is happening, that has changed within my day. I wasn’t feeling tired, but now I am. That didn’t happen when the pain was there full force. I wasn’t able to distinguish the exhaustion beyond just knowing I was in pain and felt like shit.
The pain is always worse when I am tired, and so it became a vicious cycle. I would be worn out from worrying and feeling the pain and from not sleeping because of the pain, which would make the pain worse, because I was always exhausted. I am now able to recognize that I am feeling fatigued and I am allowing myself to take needed breaks. If I push myself too hard, then the pain will begin to creep up (no matter how much Skunk I use.) If I rest, it will stop the pain’s escalation and bring back the manageable levels. I now realize that the fatigue didn’t go away, it was just another thing hiding behind the pain.
So… I have “DFS” (Dead Feet Syndrome) and I am again feeling fatigued. I’m pretty sure my “sales pitch for pot” is not going over so well. But I don’t want to portray cannabis as something that is magical, that does the unimaginable, because that hasn’t been my experience and certainly not what I want to be a take away from this. I want to be able to share that although it isn’t “curing” me of anything it is “helping” me a whole lot and although I can’t speak to whether it could help with things like “DFS” or fatigue (which may well be the case with a different strain) my sole object when setting out on this adventure was to try and find relief from the pain. In that regard it has been a success!
There is one more perk to tell you about. I am actually accomplishing things. This may not be directly related to me using marijuana but it definitely needs to be given some credit. Now that I am finding relief I am feeling more optimistic and hopeful. I am managing to do more and feel as if I am slowly getting back on track to being my old “badass” self. Although I have been blogging for almost 4 years and have spent plenty of time on social media trying to pimp out my story, I have had limited success. I’ve had posts that have had decent response (Multiple Sclerosis & Cannabis: Can Marijuana or CBD Oil Help with my Pain), a few others that teetered on being noticed (Disease & Divorce: Did MS End My Marriage?) and others that bordered on TMI (Tecfidera Constipation Update: The Shit Hit the Fan) but nothing significant. In the past few months, since starting on my MMJ adventure I have begun to receive recognition for my writings – and that is pretty damn cool.
Hell, if I had known that marijuana was going to be the secret to my success, I would have started this adventure a long time ago!
EVERYDAY HEALTH ARTICLE
QUOTED IN HEALTHLINE
HIRED TO WRITE TWO ARTICLES FOR HEALTHLINE
Article 2 coming soon: I Tried Medical Marijuana for My MS
LISTED ON STAIRLIFT REVIEWS Top 100 Blog list
I am not making the claim that cannabis works miracles but I am making the claim that cannabis works as the legitimate medicine that it is. Unlike the slew of prescription medicines I have tried over the years, that left me tired, bloated, fat, constipated, dry mouthed, groggy and foggy, marijuana is curbing the pain without the annoying side effects and allowing me to be me again! I am succeeding because I am doing things – I am able to be productive and proactive and take steps towards the goals that I have been thinking and dreaming about for a long time.
Sitting on a couch- mindlessly watching show after show may well be the stereotype of a stoner but in my life, it’s the opposite. Before using cannabis, I was the couch potato…. I didn’t much like how my life was playing out but I had little control over it, because the pain was the boss, it decided what I could or couldn’t do, not me. These days I am waking up early again, ready to “jump” (aka roll) out of bed and get my day started…
I am looking forward to things; I am once again excited to get out of the house, meet people and just enjoy life. That is a huge change and I have cannabis to thank for that. I have found something that helps, and so I am willing to put up with the skeptics and naysayers and even my kids and the jokes. After all, according to Max (my 14 yr old)…
“She’s always high, this is her job now.”
**This is my personal blog and all opinions are my own. I am not a doctor, nor do I play one here on my blog. The content here is for informational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended to replace the advise of medical professionals. Be sure to contact your doctor before trying any new medications/vitamins/supplements, physical activities or therapies **